Lights Out Films

Post #998: State of the State

“Call on God, but row away from the rocks.” – Hunter S. Thompson

I don’t want to say that I’m at a crossroads (so cliche) but it’s exactly there that I find myself. It feels as though I’m positioned exactly on the edge of a precipice, ready to step off or back away in whimpering fear. I’m not entirely sure what I’m going to do with website, I’m not entirely (though I have a slight idea) about what I’m going to do with my life. I’m not saying this hoping for pity, but it’s a real, serious time for drunken contemplation.

Sometimes you felt yourself being drawn into art and music without any conscious reason why. For instance, I have no idea why I felt the overwhelming urge to view, absorb “Apocalypse Now” today. The feeling was so strong that while driving to work on the 15 at 7:30am, I wanted to turn around and get lost in the madness.

This isn’t the mojitos talking, though I’m sure that it has a little bit to do with it.

After seeing that blowhard Fred Durst screwing around and acting a fool, I feel a lot better about myself. Not that it matters to anyone out there, I’m just sayin’. And suing Gawker.com?!? C’mon friend. Though the word about your small penis has spread through the world like the Avian Flu, there’s no reason to get all litigious about it. Suck it up, stop taking cameraphone vids of you f-ing some groupie and live with it. Either that or actually make music that will sell records. God knows that won’t happens, you no talent hack. At this point, Fred is subsisting primarily on the fumes of two white teenagers’ anger in Tupelo. So sad.

So this post hasn’t been the emotional revelation that I wanted it to be. So what? That’s life. It’s scary and weird here on the edge of a new life. I’m about to embark on a new adventure and I’m not really sure which way is up. All I know: I love a girl, I’m currently too drunk to drive (or write apparently) and about to step into something very big and important.

I wouldn’t want it any other way.